So, I have these friends. Really, really good friends. Two of my best friends even. And they are married to each other. I’ve had the joy of watching their relationship for the last year and I have to say that these two impress me. Not because they are the perfect couple. I think they’d be the first to tell you that they aren’t. Well, after they feigned shock that I would say such a thing. 🙂 They crack me up.
I’ve gotten to watch this crazy transformation of their relationship over the last 6-8 months which, if I’m honest with myself, has given this cynic some hope. They are high school sweethearts and have been together for more than 20 years, yet I’ve watched them turn into newlyweds almost two decades after they said their “I do”s. I think the biggest thing that has struck me is that I get to witness this sweet friendship between the two of them.
There have been moments where the two of them seem to get so lost in each other, that they have no idea that anyone else is watching them. I was lucky enough to capture this moment on film while we were out one day. The best part was that I was just randomly shooting what was going on around me and took a picture of them. When I was checking out my pictures later, I saw it. It just caught me. It has to be one of my favorite pictures of them.
Obviously the picture is not one that is perfectly shot. The lighting is all wrong. There is that horrendous glow on his face that has nothing to do with the love he has for his wife. But the looks on their faces. That is something that cannot be recreated. They share this bond, this friendship, that is fun to watch.
So why does this strike me so much. Well, it’s one of the things that I am looking for in a partner. I want to be with someone that is also my friend. Actually, that is on the top three of my list and is a deal breaker. If we can’t enjoy each other in the normal, non-romantic everyday, I don’t want it. It’s just that important to me. Harsh I know, but I also know that relationships are hard. It’s not something that comes easy just because you found that perfect person. There are days where you may have to remind yourself that you love the person laying next to you in bed. There are days that the romance just isn’t working and you have to rely on your friendship to get you through. Then there are days, like I said before, you love the person unconditionally, but at that moment you are not very fond of them. For me, I need the balance of both. I need my lover to also be my friend.
So when I get to see these little moments that my friend’s probably aren’t even aware of, it gives me hope for my future. Especially on the days when I doubt that romance and friendship can be found in one relationship.